Grandma

For those of you who were there at the wedding, you must have all witnessed how emotional I was when my brother mentioned my grandma. She is 93 years old this year and she is my favorite person in the universe. Because my parent's work, I was sent back to live with her at early age. I was and still am her favorite grand child among all 21 of them. She was born a merchant's daughter but was married to my grandfather whose family farmed rice for a living. She would tell me stories about how much hardships she endured in the early years of her marriage, getting adjusted to the farming life.

When I lived with my grandparents, they always spoiled me with the best things they had to offer. She saved me chicken thighs every time because that was my favorite. She made sure that every demand little JoJo had was met. One time, I so foolishly put my foot into a running bicyle wheel while ridinig on the back and hurt my foot so badly (a piece of flesh was shaved off)I couldn't walk for one month. My dear grandma carried me on her back everywhere I wanted to go. with such a tiny body! At age 88, she was still living alone and cooking for herself, claiming that since she has five sons and one daughter, it was unfair for her to burden any one of them. We had bought her a washer but she insisted on doing her own laundry... by hand. That's who she is, a stubborn but lovely old lady! (the same trait you can probably see in me). Then she fell on her back 2 times at age 89. When I saw her in the hospital after her surgery, it was the first time in my life that I saw a weak and vulnerable grandma. I went outside and wept and realized for the first time that my grandma was getting old. Ever since then, she has to live with a maid even though she is still telling us that once she gets better, she wants to live by herself again.

I try to go see her as often as I can. It's not an easy journey from Hong Kong to Douliu (almost 8-hour of air/train travel time one-way) but she is my grandma and I miss her so dearly when I don't see her. Even though every time I see her, she tells me the same old stories, reminds me again and again that I ought to get married soon (before I become 'expired' goods), and asks me the same questions, but just by sitting there with her, I feel I can already be at peace and be a child again. and I know, I also make her happy by just being there. so this weekend, I am going to see her and this time, I can finally tell her, her old granddaughter finally married herself off before she becomes expired goods...

--Joyce

One-Week Anniversary

it's been one week since JoJo started her new job. gone is the glamourous life as a private equity investor. her schedule is fairly rountine: up by 6.30am, out the door by 7.30am, bus to Shenzhen from 8am to 9am and taxi to work from 9am to 9.30am. 3 hours from bed to work! many people have questions about such commute arrangement. well it is not the easiest commute in the world but what JoJo also sees is a whole new world. she used to work until 3 or 4 am and get up around 9 or 10am and always felt she was on a rush to do things. and her commute sometimes was worse because she would need to get up sometimes at 6am to catch 8am flight just for a meeting in Shanghai at noon! now, she walks to the bus station at 7.30am and she notices many different things she never used to experience in life. free news papers (4 kinds of them!), time for sit-down breakfast, time to read the FT on the bus and time to look out of the window instead typing feverishly on blackberry. work is exciting although much slower paced. but she feels she gets a lot done during the day and still has all the time after work even after factoring in the 3-hour roundtrip commute!

God is fair. everyone gets the same 24 hours whether you are man, woman, black, white, rich or poor. everything in life is a give-and-take. if you choose to devote 18 hours to work and all you have left for yourself and loveones are 6 hours. jojo has spent all her twenties climbing the ladder and neglecting herself and her family and now she thinks it's time to slow down. does she feel something is lost with such a huge transformation? does she miss her frequent flyer miles and hotel points? of course! but then she looks at what she gains from this new experience, she knows immediately why she chose the path she did. will she ever regret her choice? maybe, but then she will remind herself that every decision made in her life has been carefully considered and debated and if she shall choose to make a decision, it would've been the best decision she could've made at the time with the information at hand. no point looking back but one should only look forward and try to make the best out of it...

Happy Valentine's!

Thank you!

Dear all,

Thank you again for coming to our wedding. We hope you all had a great time. Many of you have traveled a great distance to be in Panama with us on this important day to share our joys and tears of love and no matter how many times we said it, we just can't thank you enough. My parents (and parents-in-law) have all told me many many times that this shows how much each of you care about us and what great friends you guys are. You have all been very important to us every stage of our lives and your support, love and friendship is what molded us into who we are today. 30+ flight/travel time is not something easy to endure and we never expected so many of you to be there given how busy each of you are and how difficult it was for you to take time off (3 full days in travel time!). I am so blessed to have all of you to be my great friends and to have you to be there with me as I walked down the aisle. For those of you who couldn't make it, we thank you as well for sending us your love and wishes, we regret not having you there but we were certainly thinking of you and wishing you were here with us. So again a big thank you, a big hug and a big kiss from both of us to all of you!

Second of all, I want to thank my new mom and dad. You have both worked so hard for this wedding and wow, I mean WOW, it was spectacular! I arrived in Panama only a week before everyone else did and already I could feel that the stress was unbearable and I can't imagine having to live through the planning and stress for the last six months. Mom and Dad went an extra mile to make sure all the little details were taken care of and that each of my guest would feel home as soon as they step on the soil of Panama. My participation in the wedding preparation was limited and short and yet I was able to show up at my wedding and have everything taken care of. I often joked that I was the groom in this wedding since I didn't need to do anything but the reality was, I was so busy with work last year I counldn't have done anything even if I was asked to. Even up until 2 weeks before wedding, I was still so tied up with my job change and my parents-in-law have so understandingly taken of the duty and responsibilities. Unlike many other girls, I never grew up dreaming about my ideal wedding but what you planned and delivered was so much more than what I have expected and dreamt for. When I walked in to the reception and the fireworks went off, I was so much in shock and couldn't believe what I was seeing. Fireworks! A surprise gift from Mom and Dad (and I can't even think about it without tearing my eyes). Thank you for taking me into your loving family!

Lastly, I want to thank Jaime, who's put up with me (and Linda) all these years (4 years and 8 months and counting!) and particularly the last 3 months when I was going through the toughest the decision with my job. He had left Hong Kong right after Xmas to be in Panama to take care of the wedding planning. Every time he called me, something had always gone wrong and our conversation would always ended with me screaming at him. He was alwasy so patiently waiting for me to calm down and never once lost his temper. Being the proud me, I was always reluctant to admit that I was wrong but he always found ways to calm me down, even though he was thousands of miles away. During the last three weeks, he barely slept, taking care of every single little details of the wedding and occasionally taking care of psycho Linda or freaking out JoJo. I was so touched and moved and was ever more convinced of why this is the guy I should marry. Thank you Jaime, for accepting all the little and big faults of me, for sharing with me a loving family and for adoring and spoiling me the way you do.

--Joyce